The power of reappraisal

In our previous post, we talked about how re-appraisal of stress can affect your health. It is some kind of self-fulfilling prophecy: if you believe that stress is bad for you, it will have more negative health consequences.

 

Make the strategy of reappraisal or re-evaluation your close friend – not only when it comes to stress.

This will help you in many other areas of life. You might have ideas and concepts anchored in your mind that are not accurate. For example, you might be sure, that you are quite a lazy person. This idea could have been planted there already in your childhood, when you parents called you lazy because you didn’t want to clean your room. It was probably reinforced during your teenager years, since teenagers usually have other priorities than working hard in school, and are being called lazy on a regular basis. Maybe you got back on track, when you started working or studying – but the concept of your character already contained the description “lazy”.

 

Self-concept reappraisal

Now, this is where the problem lies: we think of ourselves as a quite clearly defined entity with certain traits. We believe, we know ourselves, that we can predict how we will react in specific scenarios and – most importantly – that we won’t or will hardly change.

However, we do not base our self-concept entirely on extensive reflection and detailed observations of our own behavior. We might use these tools, but our self-concept will always be integrating the views, thoughts and comments that others make about us. If you kept hearing that you are a lazy person, you might have decided to prove them all wrong, but more likely, you accepted this description into your idea about who you are.

As a consequence, the word lazy pops up, whenever you do not feel like doing a task. You will say to yourself: “I just can’t help it. I am a lazy person.” It is the best excuse that you can come up with, because it sounds so definite and fits perfectly into the narrative that you repeat. If you simply are a lazy person, how could you ever change that?

 

A simple strategy for reappraisal

This is where re-appraisal comes into play: As soon as you hear your inner voice uttering such a sentence, think about the description.

Are you really lazy, low-energy, anti-social, a loner, difficult, etc.? Start by writing down all these descriptors that you give yourself. Make a little list over a couple of days. Then, try to find evidence in the past as well as in the present. Were you really a lazy child or did you simply not like cleaning your room, but were active in sports and engaged in school? Were you really a lazy teenager or did you just invest your energy in writing sad song, trying to master a cool skateboard trick or doing everything to impress your crush? Now as an adult, are you really lazy or are there good reason why you want to avoid a certain task? Are there concrete reasons, that are not based in a negative trait you are assigning yourself?

 

Watch out for these pitfalls

When doing this little exercise, avoid the trap of generalization. Just because you might be lazy, when it comes to doing the dishes, does not make you a lazy person. You might invest a lot of energy into gardening, or cooking or your job.

Also, notice patterns of disqualifying all the evidence that speaks against your theory about who you are. For example, a childhood memory of you setting the dinner table might come up, and you brush it away thinking “That was just a one-time-thing. Usually, I was indeed lazy.”

 

Last, but not least: You can change!

If all the past and present evidence shows that you are a super lazy couch potato, but you want to change that: go ahead. Our character is not set in stone. Our brain stays flexible until old age.

That notion that “we develop our personality until we are 15 and then we are who we are” is completely incorrect. The brain can not form news neurons (except for in the hippocampus), but it constantly alters the connections between existing neurons. That way it stays adaptable – and so are you.

If you want to become a more energetic and active person, do it! Start by changing how you describe yourself. When you catch your inner voice talking about how lazy and always tired you are, talk back to it. Remind yourself of examples, when you are full of energy. Soon you won’t just become more active, but your self-esteem will increase drastically, when you start cutting out all the negative and inaccurate descriptors. Don’t let self-directed negativity hold you back!

 

© Rebecca Böhme & Andrew Wold, 2018. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to the authors with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

Photos by Cody Davis and ian dooley on Unsplash 

 

 

Rethink stress, live longer!

 How many of you have been experiencing heavy loads of stress? Even if you’ve experienced moderate stress, how bogged down and irritated are you that you’ve had to endure all that horrid stress? Many of us believe that stress is inherently bad, and something to be reduced to the absolute minimum, but rethinking stress could be a life saver.

We have all heard of strategies to reduce stress, go for a walk or get some kind of exercise, take a moment to breathe, talk to someone; which are all great pieces of advice. These strategies attempt to deal with stress, but even better is to reappraise stress entirely. That means rethink stress, not as a useless burden, but as a positive function. From now on believe that stress is a healthy service that your body provides to help you achieve and perform your very best.

It’s true that prolonged stressful experiences can lead to negative health outcomes, but if we perceive stress as harmless, or better yet a positive motivator, we can protect ourselves from an increased risk of premature death. In a study of 28,753 US residents who completed a survey asking about their experiences of stress, perceptions of stress, and if they sought help for their stress, the following data was gathered:

After a 9 year follow up a total of 2,960 (10.3%) of the original participants had died. Taking into account experiencing moderate to heavy amounts of stress and a belief that stress impacts health resulted in an increased risk of premature death by 43%! The authors admit that this study cannot establish a causal link between stress perceptions and early death, but intuitively we can all imagine the torturous grind of believing stress is negatively affecting you combined with heavy to moderate life stress. Believing something like stress is bad for you – and heavily engaging in it – is, in fact, terrible for you.

Are you at all surprised about how many people experienced moderate to heavy amounts of stress? Where do you find yourself on this questionnaire, especially when it comes to your perception of stress? I personally find it striking that many people don’t choose to take action to control stress. We can do that for ourselves now by remembering the push our body gives in response to a stressful situation is there to lift us up, not hold us down. The next time you feel that strong pulse and increased consumption of energy, know that that is your body saying “challenge accepted”.

Scientific Literature:

Keller, A., Litzelman, K., Wisk, L. E., Maddox, T., Cheng, E. R., Creswell, P. D., & Witt, W. P. (2012). Does the perception that stress affects health matter? The association with health and mortality. Health Psychology, 31(5), 677.

 

© Rebecca Böhme & Andrew Wold, 2018. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to the authors with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Photo by Emma Simpson on Unsplash